Putting My Toes in the Water

One of my favorite summer memories is of vacations to Lake Michigan with my family and with our church youth group. Wide stretches of sandy beaches were perfect for sun-tanning, playing frisbee and football, and building sandcastles. The water, however, was equal parts fun and frigid! Even in the hottest part of summer, the water temperature in Lake Michigan is only in the 60’s F. Still, we would work up a sweat and then cool off in the wavy water. There were two ways of entering Lake Michigan – run in as fast as you could until the waves knocked you down and you went under, or slowly inch your way in as the lowest parts of your body became numb to the cold. Each method has its benefits and I have employed both options at different points in my life. In my younger years I would plunge headlong into the waves thrilling at the cold rush against my hot skin. Nowadays, I gingerly stick my toes in the wet sand where the waves meet the beach and SLOOOOOOWLY edge further out, testing my resolve to go in. 

So goes the birth story of Straw Hat Flower Farm. When I first decided to grow and sell cut flowers, I dove in headfirst! I bought books, scoured the internet for information, bought seeds, created a grow room, dug up a portion of our newly seeded lawn to make flower beds, decided on a business name, and even began to look for land to buy. I plunged myself into flower farming just like I had plunged my teenage body into the cold Lake Michigan water. And then. 

There are so many mental gymnastics in those two little words. I started to think about the enormity of starting up a business (we’ve been there before), doubted my abilities and worried about failing. Failure and I are not good friends. Fear of failure has prevented me from even trying things I really wanted to do, and this situation was no different. I tucked my flower farm plans away and decided to just grow flowers as a hobby. While there’s nothing necessarily wrong with that plan, I just couldn’t get my “baby” out of my head. I’d lay awake at night thinking about what my farm would’ve looked like, the bouquets I would’ve made, what my marketing materials would’ve looked like. Eventually, it just seemed foolish to waste so much mental energy on something I wasn’t going to do, so I stuck my toes in the water. I took an online class, developed a scaled back startup plan, invested money in moving forward and Straw Hat Flower Farm was born…again. As I inched forward with my plans, I began to feel less afraid and more excited by the possibilities! Don’t get me wrong…I still have moments of doubt, get overwhelmed by the enormity of what must get done and wonder what in God’s green earth a 54-year-old woman is doing starting a flower farm! But my toes are fully in the water and I’m anticipating the coming plunge! 

Come dive into Straw Hat Flower Farm with me!